sanity break.

it's been awhile since i last wrote. it's probably time for a life update on the past several weeks, but i'll do it later. :) not feeling it right now.

today was a blah day. it started out that way, anyway. i woke up with a headache, so it was doomed from the get-go. the headache got worse, and so did my outlook on life.  i took a nap.  then i grabbed my keys, slightly impulsively, and left.

first, i went to the most natural place to go when you need some joy infused in your life (starbucks), then i hit up the gas city park. (for those of you not from around here, yes, there is a nearby town called 'gas city.' ha-ha, i know.) anyway, it was chilly and beautiful, and for the most part, secluded, which is exactly what i needed. i picked a red park bench, painted in dappled patterns of afternoon sun and leafy shade. with tall caramel machiato in hand, i sat for a few minutes, clearing my head, being still.

then, i pulled out my Bible and journal, and did my thing. words dripped from my heart, from my pen, flowing faster than i could scribble.

when my fingers were too cold to keep writing, i shoved them in my pockets and watched the water in front of me for awhile. the whole thing was really just so picturesque, with the pond and the sun and the weeping willow blowing in the chilly breeze.

i don't know what it is about water and me, but when i'm near it, i get this sense of OK-ness. it doesn't matter if it's the mighty waves of the cold irish sea or the dinky pond in gas city, indiana, it's refreshing... comforting... needed. you know?

anyway, i'm feeling much better now... my head and my heart. sometimes, i just need to give myself room to breathe. a real update will come later, i promise. hold me to it. life gets busy and then i forget to write.


ps. isn't fall wonderful?

jim and pam.

i should be studying for my specialized reporting test tomorrow. according to the quad-shot latte i just finished, i should be good for a little longer (though it has yet to really kick in... hmm). but instead of studying, my mind drifts to the office season 5 premiere.

jim and pam are getting married. MARRIED. as it should be. as it always should have been.


i have to admit that last season's premiere was pretty spectacular, with meredith getting hit by the car and all (ha)... but JIM AND PAM GETTING ENGAGED in the first episode of this season?? it was unexpected, and i adore that. actually, can i just list the wonderful things about this engagement? ok great.

1. it's jim and pam. and they are FINALLY engaged. (duh.)
2. it was definitely not expected for a season premiere.
3. it happened in the rain. (sigh.)
4. it happened at a gas station halfway between the two of them in the middle of the day - so unexpected, but an obvious sign that jim missed her and needed her and loved her.

so basically, it was perfect.

perhaps i am a bit nerdy, but come on. if you love the office, you probably loved this episode, too. ...maybe not enough to blog about it. but then again, it is 1.30 am and i'm running on 4 shots of espresso... and an extreme will to procrastinate studying.

jim and pam halpert. AHHHH!

bachman weekend.

last weekend was parents weekend at taylor. this year, all the bachmans came up for the weekend of mayhem. (on parents weekend, taylor has a specific schedule of events and activities and concerts... we never do any of them.) we do our own thannng.

on saturday, we watched women's volleyball (ellie was in 7th heaven), had a waffle breakfast in my apartment (thanks to my talented and rather domestic roommate, kaitlyn), we ate at 'hoes, we goofed off (naturally), we went to mi pueblo (more on that in a minute...), and then the parentals went to bed for the night. ...so what did the four bachman children do? we made a big pot of coffee and put in office season 4. and LOVED OUR LIVES. (we are such siblings.)

on sunday, we went to our baller church, had lunch at the cracker barrell, and then said our goodbyes.

such a delightful weekend. i'm rather blessed.

LOVE HER.

quatro!

at this delicious little mexican place called mi pueblo, they do this special thing for birthdays. they sing a mexican song and smother the birthday person's face in whipped cream. it wasn't james' birthday, but the possibility of this happening was too fantastic to pass up. so we lied when he wasn't looking. (watch the video below, taken right after the incident...) ahh ha ha, i love my life.

one life.

so, my freelance writing teacher talked for almost all 3.5 hours of our tuesday night class on the topic of... time management. he said a lot of things, most of them very convicting, and eye-opening, and whatnot. of course. and then he said, with great passion, "PEOPLE, life is not a dress rehearsal! this is the only life we get." ooh, so true.

he talked about how often we always say we're going to start doing ___ when ___ finally happens. but that's stupid. he's right - we only get so many days. we can't wait around. we are living life. this is it! my personal goal for this year is to live it up. it's a terrible cliche, but i honestly don't want to waste a moment. (maybe if i don't sleep...?)

recap on my life of late:

last weekend was perfect. i went to michigan (for the first time ever!) with my lovely, dear friend sarah. we wandered through st. joe. we layed out for multiple hours at the gorgeous BEACH. we chased seagulls. we laughed at the annoying, loudmouthed freshmen nearby. we imitated the annoying, loudmouthed freshmen nearby. we laughed. we talked. we took pictures. we soaked up the feeling of relaxation. it was delightful.

[living the life.]

this past week has been busy and tiring. i'm currently trying to find the balance between writing (aka: every class i'm taking, plus the newspaper) and life. i don't want to get burnt out, but weekly deadlines will do that to you... Lord, beer me strength.

i have had fun, though. i recently acquired the office season 4, which is scientifically proven to make life better.

[we screamed. kind of like we did last year when we drove to muncie to pick up season 3. we are devoted fans and lovers of this show.]

so basically, life is good but busy and tiring. i definitely need more sleep. and a semi-decent bedtime. what else is new?

the semester of writing.

i've now officially had one of each class. i like most of them. i don't think i'll hate any of them. i may get sick of/overwhelmed with writing for the first time in my life, however. (scriptwriting, specialized reporting, freelance writing, and theater and the church. and i'm a co-editor for a section of our newspaper.) geeze. louise. i'm sure i'll survive and i'm sure i'll come out a better person and a better writer. i think i'm just in that first-day-syllabus state of shock.

as i was in our apartment kitchen this morning, pouring my coffee, the stove clock caught my eye. then i glanced at the microwave. according to both, i was already a minute late to my 8:30 scriptwriting class. and i hadn't even left my apartment. (great first impression, blake.) i was 5 minutes late to class, which i didn't think much of until the professor reached that part of the syllabus. he explained that tardiness was just "not cool" and how we're upperclassmen and should know better. ouch. so of course, i felt the need to apologize afterwards. as people were leaving, i walked to the front of class. "um," i started. "i... just wanted to say i'm really sorry for being late this morning. i have a chronic problem with lateness. it's no excuse, i know, but i'll work on it. and i'm sorry." he laughed, then asked if there was any problem he should know about that he could help accommodate for. "oh, no..." i said, "it's just me not being a morning person and not leaving soon enough. it's stupid and really not an excuse." he laughed and said he married a woman who has been late her whole life. "this is good to know, though," he said. he motioned toward my coffee mug. "i'll tell you what. if you decide to be late someday, just pour me an extra cup of coffee before you leave." um... deal.

it would seem i have some new cool professors this semester.

another cool professor is my freelance writing teacher in ft. wayne. it's a heck of a drive to get to the ft. wayne campus (1 hour there, 1 hour back), but after my first class on tuesday night, i'm thinking it will be worth it. he's intense, and extremely challenging, no doubt, but it's going to be so good for me, and so worth it. and he's unbelievably experienced, having written for magazines like TIME... and he's written books, too. (ok, those are lame credentials, but he is amazing! i just can't remember specifics.) anyway. we don't leave his class without being published, he said. that's exciting.

the echo is going quite well. i enjoy our section. this week, we're highlighting all the new things on campus, and one of my stories is on president habecker and mary lou's new SEGWAYS. i'm not kidding. if i get my way, we'll have pictures of president habecker and gob bluthe from arrested development on their segways, side by side. we'll see.

ok. this writer is hitting the hay. but before i do, i will say this... in regards to this crazy semester of writing. to quote sir kanye: "n-n-now that that don't kill me can only make me stronger." word.

returning thoughts.

summer didn't seem short until i arrived at taylor. as i turned left onto the loop, and saw the back of grace olson hall, it was like deja vu - floods of memories and emotions. it felt like i just packed my little red honda up a couple weeks ago, instead of three whole months ago. the feeling was vivid. time flies, no?

life is so familiar here. it is home. i don't mean that in a cute-sy way. i love st. louis, but my heart is here. i don't know if it's possible to adequately explain why i love this place so much. i mean, words come to mind... words like: cornfields, insane traditions, dear friends, paynes coffeeshop, wonderful/intentional/crazy community, the best professors in the world (i realize i am completely biased), handy andy, the student union, our beautiful campus, backroads, chapel (i can't wait), the way God works... you know i can go on... the joy it brings my heart to be with my friends really cannot be expressed. it's a huge family here. quirky brothers and dear sisters. sweet reunions.

right now, i'm a bit overwhelmed by God's goodness. i had a good phone conversation with my dear friend sarah on the way up to taylor. we both had a bit of a rough year last year, for some different reasons and for some of the same. but we're neighbors now. we live across the hall from each other in our brand new, BEAUTIFUL apartments. and we both had refreshing summers full of God's goodness and beauty. (granted, she was in IRELAND for half of it... but... my summer was still good. despite that.) i guess you could say we're kind of excited for this year...

i adore living off campus, by the way. if last year was a year of growth for me, i'm interested/STOKED to see what this year will end up being. i've already felt blessed in the two days i've been here. thanks, God. you are good.

got baaaptized!

i just got home from my sweet swimming pool baptism! (literally. my hair is still drying.) but yeah... it was really great. since some of you couldn't be there, i'll let you know what went down... (and thanks, by the way, for being excited for me. i may have the best friends in the world? just throwing that out there. but really, your excitement means a lot. and this baptism meant a lot to me. it was that next step for me, you know?)

so i shared my "story," hitting on the spiritual highlights, from that sunday school classroom at age 4, to my missions trip to russia at age 16, to taylor, to a semester in ireland... there was so much more i wanted to share, but felt like i'd hog too much time, so i left it at those "highlights." then when i actually got in the pool (it was cold, and deeper than i anticipated when i hopped in), my pastor said some words, then "dunked" me (is there appropriate baptism terminology for that?)... and while i was under, i don't know what happened, but i started choking under water. then i came up and gasped for air and started laughing. way to go, blake. way to go. it was supposed to be this meaningful moment... which it was... but then i just had to add my little touch to things. oh gosh.

but it was great. and i love the timing... it's a good way to go into my senior year. speaking of which. i leave on tuesday. and i haven't packed a thing. ooops. better get on that. (i am the world's worst packer. i leave it all until the last minute because i hate it so much... ahh. you'd think after 3 years, i'd be a pro...)